Dear Library User, How Hard is it to Follow the Fucking Rules?

This rant brought to you by the asshole with the bagel.

Specifically, I'm talking about the rules that have been established for users at the library I work at. It's not hard. Really, there are only a few rules that one must be aware of and abide by, and even those aren't really that hard.

The rules that I'm talking about are:
1. Lidded beverages are okay, non-lidded beverages, not so much.
2. No food allowed. Period. If you want to eat, take it outside (meaning outside outside), or take it to the brand new, shiny and wonderful cafe that was built for you unappreciative assholes and just opened a couple weeks ago.
3. This is a quite zone, which means no group work and no talking on your cell.

In case you are unclear about any of these things, there are signs posted all over that repeat these rules and indicate if maybe rule three doesn't apply because of the area you're in.

Of the above rules, I've never had a problem with the first one. A few times a week we have to talk to people about 2 and 3. Usually it's not a big deal.

You may not realize that I can see pretty much everything going on in the library from the counter. It is a big open space after all. You also may not realize that because of the way this building was designed and the way the acoustics are, I can hear just about everything that goes on, especially when there are less than a dozen people in here, as there were this morning.

So when you sit down about 20 feet from the desk and start unwrapping the wax paper bag that holds your bagel, what do you think the most likely outcome is going to be? I'll tell you what it is. I'm going to roll my eyes, look for where the sound came from, come out from behind the counter and tell you that food is not allowed. Your options at this point are either to 1. put it away until you leave or 2. take your food to the above mentioned cafe and eat it there.

Of course you took the high road, what with your frustrated sigh, and jamming your bagel back into the bag, getting up in a huff before I was done talking, and storming out to the other end of the hall to stare into the library (from the other library where food still isn't allowed) and eat your bagel in silent fury. Oh, and saying "Thanks bro" to me as you walked in was total class. I hope you choked on that bagel just a little bit.

I understand that it's finals next week and you're probably pretty stressed about that. And hey, it's early-ish in the morning and you're probably hungry. Maybe you should have eaten your bagel before coming into the big building full of books where food isn't allowed.

Now I've been dwelling on this for far too long, and it's starting to color my Friday poorly. I wasn't looking forward to today anyway, but you've really put the icing on the cake.

I should really get back to work, because there are a couple guys that have been whispering this whole time and I should probably say something to them. Maybe one of them will give me a big 'ol thank you like you did.

The State of Things

I realize it's been over a month since I've posted anything to the blog. Brandi keeps encouraging me to come round here and update, and by the time I get home from work, and dinner's made, and the kids are in bed, I don't really feel like being on the computer much. I really would like to get into a regular blog habit again, but I've been working on some other writing projects, and while the mood strikes me I'm going to work on those. So here's a quick update for those of you who are interested.

The Family:
Everyone's doing fine. We've had a run of colds going through the house recently, which has targeted me last. I'll be phlegmy for a while. The kids are growing quickly. Logan is doing well in gymnastics and has discovered the joys of Super Mario. Ava is getting so big, and she seems to be so smart, and she wants to walk so bad. Brandi is doing well, and has even started up a crafting project, so if you're looking for some flower headbands (mostly sewn by yours truly) go here.

Brandi and I celebrated our five-year anniversary recently by traveling down to Navy Pier and then having dinner at the Signature Lounge on the 95th (or is it 96th?) story of the Hancock Tower. It was a great night away from the kids, and it was too bad it had to be so short.

There are still little home projects going on, but nothing as substantial as the great kitchen project of '10.

The Writing:
I have a handful of projects going on right now. There's the fourth attempt at a novel, which I haven't looked at in at least a month. There's a lycanthrope story for an anthology that has a call for open submissions. Then there's a suburban fantasy story that I started the other night am just a couple handwritten pages into. I'll probably go work on that last one after I'm done with this blog post.

Work:
Work is pretty busy and getting busier all the time. I recently got approval for a big project that should keep me busy for some time.

That's all for now.

TTBC Back From Unofficial Hiatus?

First post in a few weeks. Is TTBC back from it's unofficial hiatus? Probably not, at least not right now.

So what's been going on around here? What's been keeping from blogging. The long and the short of it is family and work.

My work schedule has changed, and I'm a lot busier at work now, and the end result is that when I come home I want and need to spend time with my family and by the time Logan's in bed and Brandi and I have a little time to relax, I don't feel much like going online.

The (not-as-) new job is still going well. It's busy. I just completed the circulation stats for May a few days ago and we were up about 46% in check outs versus the previous May. It's nice that I know the job is secure and my boss and my peer group are dedicated to my success. I've been to one management seminar and I've got another one coming up next week.

They do expect me to make decisions, which is kind of intimidating at times, but everyone's patient. Some things have made me want to scream, but I've just got to let them go. The last couple days I've been in training all day on using a new automation system. Tomorrow is the last day of training this week. It's "Novelty Food Wednesday" so I'll have to go to the grocery store in a little bit to find something to bring in. I'm thinking Wasabi Peas.

Around the house, we had an issue with squirrels that was pretty annoying. The vent for our upstairs bathroom goes directly outside and isn't covered. A couple weeks ago, a squirrel or two decided that it was a prime piece of squirrel real estate. After a long and grueling battle, we are finally squirrel free. Unfortunately, Logan is now afraid to take a bath. I made the mistake of yelling at and pounding on the ceiling one day while he was in the tub and it scared him. I had no idea it would have that kind of effect, but it did. On the plus side, bath time is totally streamlined now. On the down side, it's a battle every time we get him into the tub.

Brandi and I celebrated our 4-year anniversary last week. It was a pretty low-key celebration. We're planning on going out next month as a combination anniversary and last hurrah before the baby event. For our anniversary we got new phones. Our contracts were up and U.S. Cellular was offering some good deals on new phones. I went with a pretty basic LG flip phone. It was free with the two-year contract and it does the things that I want (make calls and send text). It also has a camera that I'll probably seldom use. Brandi went with the Samsung Delve, which is akin to the iPhone. It does everything she wanted (everything) and she's quite happy with it.

This last weekend I threw a diaper shower for Brandi. We had a small group of people over for lunch. We played the "Identify what kind of baby food is in the diaper game" and everyone decorated onsies for the baby. We got a lot of diapers in various sizes, which is great. Plus, I ordered the double stroller that Brandi was looking at.

We've been working our way through DVDs of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. We're a few episodes into season 6. I'll blog about all that later, though.

As for keeping up with my friends online, I've been mostly in lurker mode, popping around here and there and reading, but usually not commenting. I'm pretty sure everyone understands why I haven't been around much. Sometimes, life just gets in the way. If I've got any readers left, I'm still around. And to my friends online, I'm sure I'll get back into the swing of things eventually.

Bad Blogger, No Cookie for You

I've been a bad blogger. It's been over a week since I've posted anything, and I haven't kept up with any of my friends online in the last week or so.

Most of this is due to my new job, which I started a week ago yesterday. The job is good, but oh man has it been a mind boggling whirlwind of information and stuff to learn. Every day last week I had a meeting of some kind, three of them lasting four hours, all while sharing my office with my predecessor so she can teach me everything she could. Just as I'm taking up the position, there are a couple of big issues that no one had really seen coming with that I have to deal with sooner or later.

To say the least, it's a challenging position that will keep me on my toes, which is a good thing. Alas, it has left me with no time to blog/read blogs during the day, and by the time I get home and spend time with Logan before he goes to bed, my brain is ready to shut down and I don't want to go online, write, read or do much of anything else. It doesn't help that we're down to one computer and I don't usually feel like using Brandi's. Although I did rent Resident Evil 4 for the Wii last week and the interactive experience of the game with the Wii controls makes it really creepy to play.

In other news, Brandi is usually pretty tired, but everything seems to be coming along okay with the baby. All of the tests have come back fine and the doctors aren't seeing any reason for concern like we had last time.

Logan is terribly two. Some days he can be an angel, some days he's a nightmare, usually he's somewhere in between. It's funny to see his personality develop and see what he picks up from us. He's started saying "bless you" after we sneeze. Tonight when I went out to check on dinner I found out that we had run out of gas in the grill, I said "poop" and of course he repeated it. He's also using his increased vocabulary to request his favorites for dinner and throughout the day, which usually includes pizza, suckers, milk, juice, and apples.

I finally finished the floor hours before my family came over for a day before Easter dinner and I'll get pictures of the finished product up eventually. It was a frustrating experience that I wanted to cut corners on to hurry up, but I didn't and it looks good now that I'm done.

The only other thing that comes to mind is that yesterday, on day six of my new job, I had to call in sick because someone had decided to deposit a spiky bowling ball in my stomach and leave it there all day. I thought I was ok when I went to work today, but after a couple hours I realized that wasn't the case. I stuck it out though because there's just so much that I have to do, and I'll do the same tomorrow I'm sure. My stomach quieted down enough while I was putting Logan to bed (it had to be me 'cause he didn't want mommy to put him to bed) that I was able to eat some toast. We'll see how that goes. Tomorrow calls for an all day training session, followed by the same on Thursday. I might be able to get out of part of tomorrow's but there's no way I'll be able to get out of any of Thursday's training. Whoo-hoo!

And with that I'm going to get ready for bed. I hope y'all are well and I'll get back into the swing of things on the blogosphere eventually.

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

Big things going on here at TTBC. I think most of my regular readers will know what I’m talking about, but for the rest of you here’s the scoop. Last week I talked about waiting, and now the wait is over.

First off. My lovely wife is pregnant again! She’s due on September 30, give or take, and while we had a couple scares early on, everything appears to be ok. The last doctor visit showed everything to be on track and there was no cause for concern with the initial screenings. For purely nerdy reasons, I’m hoping the baby’s born on September 28, because then we’d have a birthday exactly every two weeks for a month and a half. It really doesn’t matter to me when the baby’s born as long as it’s healthy, but I think we’d have a good rhythm established if it turned out that way.

Secondly, I got a new job! This is such a relief to Brandi and myself. I’ll be working full-time at the library now, and while I’m supposed to work 40 hours a week, I was warned that for managers it’s more like 50, which is still 10 less than I’m working now. The call came yesterday after I’d gotten home, and I told my boss this morning. She didn’t want to see me go, but took the news well and wished me luck. I’ve still got a couple weeks to finish up here, finish my assignments and tie up loose ends, but I’m looking forward to the new opportunity.

I hope everything’s going well for all of you.

My Desk is a Mess, Not

Last week I let everyone see just how much of a mess my desk is, which included about six months worth of stories that needed to be filed, books piled up in the corner, papers that needed to be sorted/recycled/filed, magazines and other items that needed to be put away. Well, today I took some time and cleaned it all up, so I present you with the "after" shots.

From left to right:

I also fixed my Mighty Mouse problem with a combination of the rolling it around on a damp cloth trick (I used some Orange Clean instead of rubbing alcohol) and the tape trick. Thanks Vince, MWT, and Steve for your suggestions

My Desk is a Mess

It's deadline day today and we're all feeling a little frazzled. I have a post planned for later this evening or tomorrow morning, but in the mean time, here are some pictures of my very messy desk. Unfortunately, since I played with the icon settings on my comptuer today, this also reflects the state of my desktop on the monitor at work. (click for more detailed views)

Here's the leftmost part of my desk. There are a lot of papers that need to either be filed or recycled. You might notice a pile of rubber bands to the left of my desk caddy, those were all strung together to block off a coworkers cube a couple weeks ago. He threw them at me yesterday. Along the top and taped to the front of my bins are some of the mementos I've picked up along the way.

More detail of the surface of the desk. It's a mess of back issues, papers and pens.


My monitor and tower are festooned with pictures of Logan and some figures. The mug of lousy coffee changes colors when it gets hot to reveal pictures of Logan and me. Then there's sticky notes, a couple of fortune cookie fortunes and the notes from the article I was finishing up this morning.

More pictures of Logan and Brandi on the shelf above my monitor. Under the shelf on the right are a couple of things Logan colored for me. Then we have Optimus Prime on top of the monitor, and on the shelf, Hellboy fighting a giant bat, Smokescreen and Starscream locked in eternal struggle, and some Happy-Meal style car toy that pops open at the turn of a key in back.

The right side of my desk has a whole slew of old stories that need to be sorted and filed. Hanging next to the shelf is my collection of press badges from various trade shows and events. Then there's more pictures of Logan and Brandi and a lot of comic strips that I've printed out over time. The thing in the frame behind the tape dispenser is a Paisley Name. It was given to me as a thank you after I wrote an article about some really artistic cabinet doors a woman had created.

A detail of the desk's surface. It may look neat from this angle, but it isn't, trust me. I think I'll have to do some cleaning up next week.

Waste of a Day

We've been having some email issues at work, and in an attempt to fix it (not by me), it took me 15 minutes to open Word because nearly all of my fonts were corrupted and need to be removed. Word was kind enough to provide me with a notice on each individual font. Of course I had to ok each message to banish it before it would actually open a blank document.

Grrrrrrrrr!

My cup of anger runneth over today!

Oh Noes Theys Shutting Down the Interwebs!

We got an email this morning regarding the new Internet security procedures that will be put in place over the weekend here at work. This sent my boss, who has had a rough week, into SUPER SPAZ MODE. She barreled out of the office saying she had talked to the IT person yesterday about it and she was told the company is going to block every website and will turn websites back on as we need them for work-related tasks.

*deep breath* WHATEVER!

Obviously he was just yanking her chain. But she wouldn't listen to reason and started up this big paniced rant with a couple coworkers about 4 feet behind my chair and I really had to stop myself from laughing. She was talking about everyone from the company bringing their personal laptops to work and going to Starbucks or Panera on their lunch breaks to check email and whatnot. Rediculous!

She even wanted me to call down to IT and ask them the same thing she asked yesterday to see if I got the same response. First off, no. If you want to find out, you're a grown woman, you can do it yourself. Second, you honestly think the IT staff this company has is going to be here before 8? You've got to be kidding me. (This is in no way a jab at IT staff everywhere. I know IT works very hard. It's just at this place, they've given IT such a long leash 'cause they didn't know what to do with them that IT...I can't think of an appropriate metaphor. IT has had a lot of freedom, we'll just leave it at that.)

Of course they're not going to be doing that. My wife's cousin has been a good source of inside info and I've known about this for a couple weeks now. What they're doing is shutting down "non business-related" sites, according to the email. What that's going to mean, for they time being at least, is no more myspace, facebook, Amazon, ebay, etc. You get the idea.

This just in: we got an email forwarded to use from our Editorial Director and these are the types of sites being blocked on Monday:
Shopping
Adult / Mature Content
pr0n
Hacking
IM
Social Sites

Yes folks, you're seeing that right. The company currently does not block pr0n sites. Hopefully "social sites" doesn't include blogger, but I guess we'll have to wait and see.

After seeing that email my boss still isn't convinced that they're not shutting down the whole Internet I really have to hold back the giggles.

Aaaaand Breathe

Except for a pair of editorials that are not mine to finish our September issue is done. Phew! The Big Annoying Project was completed yesterday and our pages were successfully uploaded to the printer. Today is a day to depressurize and catch up on certain things like cleaning out the inbox and cleaning up the piles of papers that have taken over my desk.

We had a good time camping, despite some mishaps, but I'll get to that later.

Busy, Busy, Busy

Pretty busy at work, so little time to post during the day. I'll just continue lurking here and there, and maybe I'll have time for a more legitmate post this evening. I will say that I was just over by Eric's blog and he has two hilarious videos over there. If you haven't gone over there to see them yet, you should. They are not to be missed.

From the 'Oh Cool' File

A little while back, I wrote about Joe Harmon for work. Joe is a grad student at North Carolina State University who is building a wooden supercar , The Splinter, for his grad project. His site is pretty well done, with webcams, photos (like the computer render above of the final product), videos, etc. He even blogs about the process of building the car here.

The car looks frickin' sweet, and it will debut at IWF, which is North America's largest woodworking trade show, and I think the second largest woodworking trade show in the world. The car will be ready for show at the show, but it won't be road-ready yet, there'll still be some work that needs to go into it.

I was all psyched to see the car, as usually the company I work for sends all the editors in my division down to the show, but alas, this year they're only sending the more senior editors due to budgetary reasons. The publishing industry, as with much of the rest of the country, as been hit pretty hard by this economic crunch thingie I keep hearing rumors about. :(

According to Joe, the car will weigh less than a traditional car made from steel, and the wood has a better strength to weight ratio than steel or aluminum. And it just looks so cool. He's found some innovative ways of using the different woods and getting the wood to do what he wants. For instance, instead of traditional metal leaf springs in the suspension, he used osage orange, which is used in bow making. The panels of the car are made from cherry wood veneers that are cut into strips and woven together into big mats that can be properly shaped. Did I mention that the car looks really cool? (and I'm not a car guy) One of the things that he had to think about while building and designing the car, that he told me about during the interview, was figuring out a way to house the engine without having the car start on fire.

The show is just 8 days away, and I can only imagine the amount of nearly around the clock work that must be going into the car to get it ready. Joe is probably getting very little sleep about now. My fellow editors have promised to take pictures for me. I'd like to meet Joe in person, maybe he'll be around at some other show in the future with some equally impressive and massive project.

Deadlines, deadlines, deadlines

Mega deadlines today and I'm dealing with people who are still trying to get me some information and the pages are due in, oh, 6 hours. (The pages in question still need to be laid out, proofed, edited, and posted.) So here's a video for y'all. It's keeping in with the current food theme that has taken over the UCF. Enjoy!


New Wearable Feedbags Let Americans Eat More, Move Less

Did you realize

that the deadline for our show issue is only a week away!?! Holy Shit! When I left work yesterday, it was like, yeah, no big deal, it's due on the 31st, we've got plenty of time. Then my coworker comes in this morning and says we've got a week. That's really different from saying that it's due on the 31st. We've got stuff written, but nothing laid out yet because the person that does layout for this particular project has been working on another project. I'm sure it will all get done in time (it has to), but still, a week left, shit.

Will Someone Stop That Beeping?

First off, I'm back. Had a good weekend up in Wisconsin, but I'll cover that later.

Someone in the office has some thingie that keeps beeping this morning. It sounds like the beep of the machines that monitor one's vitals while in the hospital. It'll start beeping for a few minutes and then stop for a while and then beep some more later. After very careful consideration, I've figured out what it is.

The sound is coming from the office of my boss's boss's boss. It must be a Justice League communicator that is summoning him off to take part in battling some global catastrophe or some intergalactic villain. I'm not sure what his powers would be, but they must be awesome indeed if he's being summoned so much. Of course he can't go because he knows I'm onto his little ruse.

Oh wait, the IT guy came and stopped whatever it was from beeping. I guess it was nothing. Unless that to is part of the ruse. Ah HA!

A Pat on the Back

Not that I want to pat myself on the back or anything...well, ok I do, otherwise I wouldn't be putting up this post. I sent out my latest article yesterday for the subject to look over and say if there's anything he'd like changed. It's just one of the things we do at our b2b here to make sure everyone's happy. It's not that I was worried about the article, but trying to finish it in light of Friday's announcement, and other things going on at home, it was tough. But it came together ok and this morning I got a very nice email from the owner of the company I wrote about. It is, thus far, the best feedback I've gotten on an article. He said:

"Matt I think the article is fantastic! It is concise and extremely well written."

That made my morning good.

Being Productive

So we got this email in the office last week that basically told us two things. First, we’re not being productive enough. Second, the company is under budget for the year so we’re not getting raises this year. Well, we might get a raise if the company can make up what we’re down in budget. No one’s holding their breath. The solution to that...are you ready...work more hours, at the same pay so that we’ll be more productive.

Then we had a meeting to hear about all this that’s going on and it started with the big wig in HR telling us that the company is putting out as much or more than last year with 33 less employees, yet we’re not productive. Hold on, that doesn’t make sense to me. So we’re doing as much or more with less and we’re not productive? Sounds to me like what we’re doing is 2+2=5 but what the company is telling us is that what we’re doing is 2+2=3.

Previously we’ve worked a 36.5 hour work week, which has been great, don’t get me wrong. Now, to be more productive, we’ll be working a 40 hour work week (not counting lunch breaks). But to make us feel all warm and fuzzy, the company is instituting flex time, of a sort. It’s not a full flex, so I couldn’t work 10 hours Monday through Thursday and take off Friday, but I could work 6-3 instead of 8-5 or a variation there abouts, as long as the deparment is covered from 10-2. All this and no merit increases, so I don’t get my measly 3% this year when the cost of everything is climbing.

This announcement came on Friday and takes effect today. Since we got this email, I don’t think my productivity has improved that much. I also don’t think it’s a good idea to make the staff all disgruntled and what not.

With the family to support, and no raise, that’s going to hurt. Now I could take some more hours at the library, but then that’s less time at home, and I’m already not home to see my son two nights a week and gone all day Saturday as well. Plus I think my lovely, beautiful, deadly wife would kill me (the insurance payoff just might be worth it). What’s a guy to do? I know, I’ll start selling organs on the black market!

That’s about it for my good news. How about the rest of you?

My Brain Hurts

Transcribing today. Ugh, this has to be the worst part of my job. Even data entry is preferable to this. And still 20 minutes of tape to go, which will take forever. Does anyone want to take over for me? Anyone?

Dealin with them crazies

So as I’ve said here before, I’ve got this part-time job at a library now. It’s a good job, you know, nice people, low stress, nice environment, etc. etc.

It’s all good, but there’s this woman that is there literally every day that is a little...off. The person that trained me said that this woman is mentally out of alignment (to put it nicely) but she doesn’t really bother anyone, and everyone just laughs off what she says. The first day I worked there she was nice and seemed to be in a good mood; last night, not so much. She came up to the counter, and this is how our interaction went:

Me: Hello. How are you today

Crazy Lady (in a frustrated tone of voice): Fine. Is that the end of the questions?

Me: *checks out DVD and hands it back to her* There you go. Have a good night.

Crazy Lady: I wish you wouldn’t tell me what to do.

Me: Awkward silence

Then she proceeded to have a conversation with the other circulation clerk about the clerks recent hair cut, which boiled down to Crazy Lady telling the other clerk she needed to grow her hair out, that it was too short.

Who would have thought a library would be so interesting?

Relief

For nearly the past 7 years I've been working at the OfficeMax in West Dundee. For a while it was OK. There are nice people who work there. I was part-time, then full-time, then I got a full-time office job and quit for a couple months. However, this didn't work with the family I was starting, so I had to go back on a part-time basis. It's not something that I wanted to do, but I swallowed my pride and went back. I've been working two (or 1.5) jobs for the last three and a half years.

People at the store have come and gone, and things change. The manager that was there when I was hired quit a few months ago, and she took any real allegiance I had to the store with her. Now, it's a little ridiculous for me to be going all the way out there, especially considering the cost of gas and the fact that when I go out there during the week it's 30 miles from the office. Compound that with working with people I couldn't stand, poor management, and dealing with the same crappy customers day after day. Needless to say, it was time to find something else.

So I began looking for something else, but I didn't want just anything. I wanted out of retail. Forever. I waited and waited, because at least I had a job right? And finally, I found it. So I applied. And then I didn't hear anything. And then I heard from them, and I got an interview and they said they'd let me know. And then I didn't hear anything. And finally, they did call me and they offered me the job. And it was glorious!

Instandly, I began to think of all the things I wouldn't have to do again: taking furniture out to customers' cars, selling add ons, selling warranties, having to worry about sales, plan-o-grams, straightening a store, dealing with the stupid managers at OfficeMax...the list goes on an on.

So this week I got to start at the library. I've only had one shift so far, but there's a lot more to it than I would have though. I know, I know. It's a library, everyone says, how hard can it be? Well there's more to it than I would have thought. I can't wait until Saturday, my last day at the Max, when I can say 'see ya' and be on my merry way. Until then, well, I've got my dreams.